Have you ever found something, a song or a poem or a story someone else created that was so much like your life you feel like it could have been written by you yourself? I heard a song 2 days ago I had never heard before and it hit deep inside my heart. If I can get this to work I will share it with you. This song says my feelings better then I ever could, but I will explain why if this works.
Here is the song I hope: http://youtu.be/X5zukvIs1aE
When I was 11 years old we were forced to leave the only home I had ever know to that point, and it crushed something inside me. I dealt with the move by telling myself someday when I was grown up I could come back and buy the house. Most people would have not wanted to go back to that house it had no indoor plumbing, no fernace the whole house was heated by 2 wood burning stoves. It was isolated in the woods with the nearest neighbor at least a half a mile away. The only ones I had to play with were my brothers and sisters. We did not have much but the one thing we had was love. It was not an easy life we had to grow our own gardens to have food sometimes in the bad times, and through it all my mom did not complain much.
My plans of returning to that house were shattered about 5 years later when I heard it had burned down. The thing about memories is they do not die just because the things you remember are not there anymore. For a time I thought ok the house is gone but maybe I can still buy the land and build another house there, but that was not to be either as the owners of the property donated it to a nature conservancy. That was bitter sweet news as I had to realize I would never be able to go back there again to live, but I also know the property will not be destroyed either.
Still there is a little girl inside me that longs to go back to that old farm house where my family was whole and love lived in every room. I still see the swings 2 for us kids on the front porch and a larger bench swing on the bad porch where my dad spent many hours in the shade of the grape vine that grew around the back porch. We had a sandy area near the front porch where my little brother spent most of the day light hours playing with his little cars on roads he dug in the sand. We did not have any dryers back then so mom and my big sisters would hang the wash to dry on lines in the back yard. We grew out own chickens and pigs so the only meat we bought was a beef roast for Sunday dinner. The house was cold in the winter and sometimes lonely when my older sisters and brother were not home till my little brother was born when I was nearly 4 years old. I love my family so much but it was my little brother I was closest to in those days. I remember when he was just starting to stand up good but not yet walking, I would wait for dad to go to work and then I would climb into the baby bed with him and take his hands and keep him from falling as I walked him from one side of the bed to another. My mom would sit at the foot of the bed sewing our close on an old pump sewing machine. I did not realize it at the time but this was an easy way for her to know that I was doing while she got the mending done. Then a few minutes before we were expecting my dad home from work mom would say to me you better get out of there your dad will be home soon, and I climbed back over the foot of the baby bed out on to the chair that sat between the bed and the sewing machine. lol My dad was always worried the older kids may accidently hurt the younger ones if we did things like that, but mom knew it would not happen and she let me do it.
I hope you all like that song because it really stirred up memories in me.
